(DISCLAIMER: This is something that hasn't happened--YET.)
Announcer: He confessed…He was extradited…He was let go. Next week on Oprah: John Mark Karr! (fade out)
Morning Talk Show Talking Head (looking intensely serious): This morning we are talking to Oprah Winfrey. She has caused quite a stir by announcing that John Mark Karr, the man who confessed to killing JonBenet Ramsey will be a guest on her show. Good morning Oprah.
Oprah (looking just as serious): Good morning, MTSTH.
MTSTH: Let’s get right to it. Why would you put this man on your show? And during sweeps week?
Oprah (looking even more intensely serious—if possible): The man disgusts me, as he disgusts everyone. I just want to get him in that chair and ask him “Why?” This is the question all of America wants to know. I just want to understand what was going through his mind. I want to understand what kind of sickness he has to do such a thing. We all want to know, and I will ask him the questions my viewers want answered. (now, getting a totally innocent look on face) And this has nothing to do with sweeps week—this was the only time we could book him…(and more lying drival we don’t need to think about.)
Coming Soon To A TV Near You
