Few people want to see the real dark face of 'God'. Most who do probably don't get to make that choice, it is thrust upon them. You read about them in religious texts - Job, Nicolas of Flue, John of the Apocalypse. I can't say I chose to look but if I am honest with myself, I know I wanted to see it. I have seen enough of it to understand something of what these people saw. I cannot explain it, nor can I make an image of it, but I am grateful for its presence, even if I fear it. It has changed my life in a very real way.
I know what Jung means when he says that: 'the purpose of the apocalyptic visions is not to tell John….how much shadow he hides beneath his luminous nature, but to open the seer's eye to the immensity of God, for s(he) who loves God will know God'. That means all of God - not just the kind and loving bits. Knowing God means really knowing, not living in denial in some fantasy world.
There is so much beauty in the world, still, even with all the difficulties we are encountering in this era. My partner says I do not like people. This is not true. I see them for who and what they are and although I don't always succeed, I try to love them anyway. Sometimes it is just impossible. I can't do it. Jesus could. And that's why he was Jesus.
Anyone can love the good in people. Who can really love people, or God, when they see that darkness? I see it because I know the darkness in my own soul. I know the dark face of God - after all, we are only God's reflection. But God's love doesn't care for you as a lover or a mother might, it isn't romantic or sentimental. S(he) who loves God must first know It, and s(he) who loves humanity, truthfully, must know it also. Anything less is just playing at love.
Note: No, I haven't converted to Christianity.
