For those who have forgotten, or those who never knew, this is about something called green stamps. Years ago, grocery stores would give 'green stamps' as a rebate/reward for shopping. They were about the size of a postage stamp and had glue on the back. You would wet the back and paste these stamps in books and when you had enough books, you could turn them in for merchandise. Anyone that watched The Brady Bunch would remember the episode when the kids tried different contests to see who would win all of the family's stamps to use.
One good thing to come out of The Mother's kitchen, was the stories. We would sit around the table for hours at a time and listen as the various visitors tried topping each other with the most hilarious tales. I have forgotten more stories than anyone can imagine--thankfully, The Youngest reminded me of this story a bit ago.
'Ann' had an appointment with her doctor--a yearly physical. Of course, she needed to use the bathroom before seeing the doctor, but, as luck would have it, there was no toilet paper. Not wanting to start yelling for some, Ann reached into her purse and produced some Kleenex, which she used. She then went into the exam room, undressed, and waited for the doctor.
After the doctor and Ann spoke for a while, he had her 'assume the position' for her pelvic exam. He sat at the end of the exam table and began what he was there for. Suddenly, he appeared over the drape. In his hand he was holding a strip of green stamps, which he had 'peeled' from Ann's nether region. "Do you want these, or should I throw them away?" he asked Ann. To put it mildly, she was more embarrassed than amused. The amusement came later. And any time she needed to use tissue from her purse, she made sure there were NO green stamps clinging.
